Brainstorm five types of questions
The holidays are coming, and if you’ll be gathering with family and friends, you might have an opportunity to sit down and talk with someone you admire, whether an elder in your family, a mentor or a person who has played an important role in your life.
In an article about how interviewing loved ones brings you closer and offers a window into the past, Dana G. Smith writes:
For the person being interviewed, the experience can help with “a sense of life completion and a sense of being heard and understood and being able to tell their story,” said Dr. Ira Byock, an emeritus professor at the Dartmouth Geisel School of Medicine specializing in palliative care.
To get started, choose a quiet time and place where neither of you will be distracted (in other words, not around the Thanksgiving table). Keeping the setting casual can help the person to open up, and using your cellphone to record the audio can feel less intrusive than video.
The article then goes on to suggest five types of questions to ask. Before you see The Times’s recommendations, brainstorm — alone or with others — a series of questions for each of the categories below:
— Lighthearted questions: Use these as a way to ease into the interview. What fun questions could you start with?
— Sensory memories from childhood: Questions that invite people to describe long-ago moments through what they saw, felt, smelled, tasted, touched or heard can help people unearth vivid memories. What kinds of questions might help people remember these kinds of moments?
— Ask about favorites: What questions can you come up to help your interviewee reminisce about high points in their lives? (Keep in mind, however, that questions about the “best” or favorite can feel daunting to answer. Instead, ask about “one of the best” or “one of your favorites.”)
— Dig deeper: Once you’ve broken the ice and are talking comfortably, what questions could you ask that might encourage this person to reflect more fully on their life and its key moments?
— Often-told stories: Don’t forget to invite this person to retell stories they might have told many times before — whether about themselves, their parents or even about you. Which ones do you remember hearing?
When you’re finished with your own brainstorm, take a look at the five questions The Times recommends, and the advice that goes with each. Feel free to add any of these questions to your list!
Finally, make plans to interview your relative, friend or mentor. When and where could this conversation take place? Would you and your interviewee like to record it? If so, what might you do with it when you’re done? For some ideas, see the StoryCorps initiative below, which offers helpful tips whether you participate in their Great Thanksgiving Listen or not.
